Fifty Shavings of Grey

Graham Woodcock, Mr Grey to his employees, and just Cocky to his mates, is a multi-millionaire. He is giving the opening speech in New York at another of his phenomenally successful timber yards and tool outlets. He spots a beautiful women in the audience who has just knocked the man out standing in front of her. She's a very forward lady. Her eyes; both of them - even the one that wanders a bit, are damp with passion for him (not the man she's just knocked out, obviously). Or is it the sawdust that's blowing about in the wind? Who is she? Why is she there? How does she lick that mole on her cheek with her bottom lip? Her beauty, and continuous ginger eyebrows intoxicate Grey. He is determined to have her… …join him at his country pile, Waney Edge, which lies deep in the English countryside and handily near the local Fish and Chip shop. Will he succeed? Will she discover his secrets? Will he take things all the way and let her into his private place? Can this book description go on for much longer? Author's Note This book is a parody offered in tribute to the fantastically successful 50 Shades trilogy by EL James. It's around 23,000 words long and includes several provocative photos depicting WPP (Wide Panel Planers), which are very big tools and not for the faint hearted. There's also a mouth-watering depiction of ASD (A Sausage Dinner) – A full recipe is provided.