Scrupulosity: A Memoir and Case Study on Life with Religious OCD

When devout faith turns into an exhausting cycle of intrusive doubts, endless self-examination, and paralyzing moral paralysis, the result isn't spiritual growth—it's the torment of scrupulosity. In this rare, deeply candid synthesis of personal narrative and psychological insight, Bill details his two-decade journey through religious Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. Moving far beyond standard self-help tropes and promises of instant cure, Scrupulosity: A Memoir and Case Study on Life with Religious OCD illuminates the subtle, terrifying ways an overactive conscience transforms sacred spiritual practices into psychological suffering. From early childhood anxiety and young adult doubts to severe compulsions surrounding salvation, public preaching, and daily moral decisions, Bill traces how religious OCD takes root—and how genuine grace and evidence-informed strategies can begin to tear it down. Inside this book, you will explore: The Lived Reality of Religious OCD: A raw, firsthand look into intrusive spiritual doubts, scripture-triggered anxiety, and relationship OCD. Pre-Decision Frameworks: Practical tools designed to dismantle ethical paralysis and reduce compulsive mental checking. Spiritual Discernment: Applying classical insights—such as Ignatian rules for discernment—to separate legitimate conviction from OCD-driven anxiety. A 360-Degree Resilience Model: Whole-person recovery strategies spanning physical, mental, emotional, social, and spiritual health. Whether you are personally navigating the torment of a hyper-scrupulous conscience, supporting a loved one through spiritual anxiety, or seeking a clinical case study on the intersection of faith and OCD, this book serves as an honest, compassionate guide toward lasting peace, clarity, and grace. "Bill Porter knows the terrors of scrupulosity. And he also knows Christianity. As longtime sufferer of scrupulously/OCD, and a successful [minister] as well, he writes from a vantage point profitable to all who suffer from scrupulously, especially those of the Christian faith. In this extremely well-written little book, Bill movingly describes the excruciating fears he suffered since childhood. He then proceeds to lay out the life-saving coping methods he learned from friends and spiritual mentors he consulted, the psychological treatments and medications he successfully employed, and the insights he gained from studying and reflecting on his malady. This is an easy, fascinating, and very insightful read that can be of great value to all those who suffer from the scrupulous form of OCD." — Dr. Ian Osborn, author of Can Christianity Cure Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder? "Bill Porter's [book] warmly sums up the inner turmoil of living with OCD, particularly for Christians. His whole-person-health approach is uncommon. He is hope-filled and gracious—yet does so from the kind lens of someone who has gone from tortured to tenacious—without being pushy. He knows what he is talking about yet stays humble in his suggestions, inviting the reader to the essential thing: walking with Christ. When Bill reached out to me to share his plan to publish a book on scrupulosity, it was my first contact with him. After reading his work, he seems like a friend and a guide. . . . Page after page, I was amazed at the insight, clarity, and suggestions provided, in line with much of what clinicians suggest and Christian leaders who understand OCD. I now consider this book a must-read for Christians suffering from Scrupulosity and would be helpful and interesting for many on the outside of Christianity and OCD." — Justin Hughes, MA, LPC, author of The Christian's Guide to Overcoming OCD