X Is For Banyon

X MARKS THE SOT Plucky P.I. Crag Banyon prays that the worst thing to happen to him this week is getting stuck on jury duty. Unfortunately for alternate juror #10 (Banyon, Crag), he is no sooner liberated from the ugliest of all civil obligations than he's confronted with an even uglier professional one: a new client. It seems some nefarious fiend with a flea fetish has kidnapped a mutt named Fifi. Banyon wants more than anything to refuse the client, but it turns out Fifi is no ordinary four-legged crotch-sniffer. The missing canine happens to belong to a couple of giants, who are desperate to get their valuable pooch back. Problem is, the giants of Giantland have no love for humans, ever since a little case involving a certain missing golden goose fifteen years ago. A case which a certain luckless ex-cop P.I. might have had a hand in back when he was part of the thin drunk line. How to make a perfect nightmare case for Banyon? Take one trip up a beanstalk, add in a few angry giants, toss in some bell-ringing beggars and one invisible maniac. Stir, don't shake. Garnish with a couple of olives, a lemon wedge, and as many bullets as you can grab from the barrel next to the door at Polly Skidmore's Pawn Shop. Five bucks a handful. An X-ceptional value.