The Funniest People Who Live Life, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes

Some samples: 1) Ohio State University football coach Woody Hayes spent a lot of time visiting ill children in Children's Hospital. One day, he got a telephone call from a woman he didn't know, but who had a daughter—an Ohio State football fan—with cancer in Children's Hospital. Coach Hayes told his secretary that he was leaving for the day, he picked up a lot of Ohio States football memorabilia, and he headed to Children's Hospital, where he spent three or four hours with the girl and some other young Ohio State fans. Player Steve Myers, who was there, says, "When we got there, you could tell it meant everything to the girl, and all the kids there went berserk. … Woody was just great to those kids." In addition, Mr. Myers says, "He did that stuff all the time, and it was always [Coach Hayes speaking], 'I don't want to read about this in the papers, do you understand?' He was that private about the things he did for people." Donna Delfino Dugay of Harper Woods, Michigan, grew up in California, where her family had a picnic at the beach when she was 11 years old. Her mother fixed each of the children a plate of fried chicken and potato salad, and then, Donna says, "When I looked up from my plate, my mother was fixing one more plate …. She turned away from us and walked over maybe 20 or 30 feet to where there was a man by himself. And he was picking his way through the trashcan. And my mother—I don't know whether she just put the plate there or whether she touched him gently or whether she said a few words—but I remember him turning to her in a gesture of thankfulness." Years later, when Donna asked her mother about this good deed, her mother claimed not to remember it; however, Donna says, "But for me, I remember it very well because for me, it was the touchstone for what good deeds became in my life." When World War II hero John F. Kennedy first entered politics, he became a United States Representative, and then he started campaigning for a seat in the Senate. While running for Senator, he campaigned in Fall River, Massachusetts, where many people were of French descent. Unfortunately, his Fall River manager, Ed Berube, made a notable mistake when he introduced Mr. Kennedy at the very first Fall River political meeting. Mr. Berube stood up and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you to meet Congressman Joe Martin." Not only did Mr. Berube get Mr. Kennedy's name wrong, but Joe Martin was a Republican! Mr. Berube thought he would be fired, but Mr. Kennedy thought the mistake was funny and went ahead with his campaign speech, saying, "Maybe Ed would rather be working with Joe Martin, but I'd rather have him working for me." Groucho Marx once asked Melinda, his little daughter, what she did at nursery school. She replied, "Oh, Daddy, all we do is paint and go to the toilet." Groucho called this "the most accurate description of a nursery school that's ever been uttered."