The God Wasn’t Supposed To Be Helpless

They've survived dragons, ghosts, and public acclaim. But nothing could prepare Crimson Valor for Guido—the sneezy, static-prone intern mistaken for a thunder god. Five years after accidentally becoming legends, the world's most questionably qualified adventuring party is back—and just as baffled as ever. Their newest mission? Escort a fledgling deity with the confidence of a wet sock across half the continent and somehow deliver him safely to the divine bureaucracy that doesn't even want him anymore. Along the way, they'll get lost in magical snowstorms, dodge romantically confused vampires, go toe-to-toe with frost giants (again), and desperately try to keep Guido from electrocuting himself every time he hiccups. There's a haunted castle on fire (they won't talk about it), a cursed carnival, some very judgmental pixies, and a goose with an attitude problem. Between accidental avalanches, ghostly confrontations, and questionable training montages, The God Wasn't Supposed to Be Helpless is a chaotic, heartfelt, and absolutely ridiculous journey through a world that takes itself far more seriously than its "heroes" ever could. It's not about saving the world. It's about surviving it—one misstep at a time.