I’d Rather Burn the Pier

This audiobook is narrated by a digital voice. Maya Calderon is a practical, unsentimental consultant brought in to help secure restoration funding. She believes problems exist to be solved, not romanticised. Ethan Rowe, the pier’s quiet and meticulous manager, believes in rules, structure, and keeping emotions out of public decisions. The funding exists. The obstacle is an outdated clause requiring final approval from a married couple connected to the pier. Neither Maya nor Ethan believes in marriage. Neither trusts the other. Unfortunately, Ethan is the only eligible co-signer, and the clause cannot be removed in time. What begins as a strictly contractual fake marriage quickly turns into forced proximity, shared domestic space, and public performances designed to satisfy a town deeply invested in appearances. As the pier’s fate hangs in the balance, Maya and Ethan must navigate not only town politics and legal pressure, but the quiet realisation that their carefully managed detachment is no longer holding. The story follows a slow-burn emotional arc driven by sharp dialogue, reluctant intimacy, and the tension between practicality and vulnerability. As the funding deadline approaches and the fake marriage reaches its planned end, both characters must decide whether walking away is truly the most sensible option. Fake marriage, Grumpy / sunshine dynamic, Forced proximity, Small-town pressure, Reluctant emotional intimacy