No, You Can't

Is it time for you to just give up? Because every time you aim low, you’ll feel like you’ve died and gone to Disneyland. You’ll be in a place where you’re never concerned about hard work, a place where you never feel guilty for goofing off all day, a place where nobody expects anything from you, a place where choosing to eat a third corn dog--or not--will be the hardest decision of your day. No, You Can’talso offers such crumbs of wisdom as: Hope is a crutch. Crutches are only good for getting two things: awesome parking at the mall and sympathy dates. Otherwise, they will just slow you down. You can’t be a failure when you have no hope of winning. Whoever said nothing is easy has never tried quitting. Aiming low is as easy as breathing. You can practically do it without thinking. And the skills required to get there--like quitting and making excuses--take less time to learn than you might imagine. All you need is No, You Can’t and the stark realization that you don’t really want to “be all that you can be.” In fact, your expectations can go so low that anything you DO achieve is completely surprising.