Why Won't you Listen? The Science of What Kids Really Hear When You Speak (THEY'RE NOT DEFYING YOU)

Every parent knows the frustration: you've just told your four-year-old not to touch something, and they immediately touch it. You've asked them to get ready for bed, and twenty minutes later nothing has happened. You've explained why hitting isn't okay, and the next day they hit again. Why Won't You Listen? reveals a truth that changes everything: your child isn't defying you. They're living in a completely different linguistic universe. While you've spent decades building the meaning of abstract concepts like "careful," "patient," "behave," and "don't," your child is constructing these universes from scratch—one experience at a time. When you say "be good at the restaurant," you're speaking a language they literally cannot understand yet. Based on 28+ peer-reviewed studies in developmental neuroscience, this book shows you how to translate your expectations into concrete, actionable language that matches how children's brains actually process information. You'll discover why negative commands process backward in young brains, why time concepts collapse under stress, and why your child can follow directions perfectly at 9 AM but melts down by 7 PM. More importantly, you'll learn exactly what to say instead—practical, tested alternatives that work with your child's developing brain, not against it.