The Handbook for the Recently Undead: A Practical Guide to the Other Side

The Handbook for the Recently Undead: A Practical Guide to the Other Side Death, as it turns out, comes with paperwork. Welcome to the other orientation manual—the one they don't hand out at funerals. The Handbook for the Recently Undead is a darkly practical field guide for navigating the bureaucratic, mythological, and metaphysical landscape that begins the moment your heart stops. Drawing from thousands of years of funerary manuals, occult grimoires, shamanic maps, and modern chaos magick, this book unpacks the hidden architecture of the afterlife as a system: a network of gates, rivers, tricksters, bureaucrats, and echoing corridors where the rules are old, contradictory, and very real. Inside, you'll find: A full cartography of the afterworld — from Duat to Diyu, Bardo to the Mauve Zone. Psychopomps and gatekeepers — how to identify, greet, or outwit the beings who will meet you at the threshold. Keys, passwords, and seals — the esoteric "access codes" embedded in Egyptian, Orphic, Enochian, and Chaos traditions. Revenant protocols — the fine print of coming back, from classical vampiric lore to digital hauntings. Modern necromantic technology — ghostbots, server-based underworlds, and the ethics of digital resurrection. Ritual scripts for orientation, communication, and (if you must) tethering. And most importantly: how not to get lost. Written in the style of a bureaucratic survival manual with occult precision, The Handbook for the Recently Undead bridges ancient afterlife cartographies and posthuman necromancy—not to moralize, but to prepare. Whether you're dead, undead, or just preemptively curious, this guide gives you the tools, language, and protocols to navigate the Other Side without becoming permanent background noise. "Death isn't the end. It's the beginning of the paperwork. " Perfect for readers of esoteric grimoires, psychonauts, chaos magicians, cultural necromancers, occult historians, or anyone who wants to be ready for their exit interview with the cosmos.